Hate gimmicks? Hate ironic nostalgia of junk wax era? Hate 25 minute box break videos?!

Then this post is not for you!

If you less-than-hate any or all of those things, let me present something that is bound to amuse you for at least 5% of its running time!

THE WORLD’S FIRST* 3D** BOX BREAK VIDEO!!1

1988 Sportflics in all its 3D glory. If you want to get all Matrix on it, ask yourself: “Is a 3D video of a 3D box break actually 6D? Or, better yet… is it… 9D?!”

The correct answer is that it’s neither, but I’m trying the hard sell on this video. We got a new camera that has 3D functionality so we thought we’d try it in that mode for a box breaks. We know full well that, a.) Practically no one has a set of 3D glasses just hanging around and b.) Even if you did, the 3D effect on a natural light box break video would barely be worth the trouble of putting them on your face. The good news is that you can ditch the 3D effect (if it’s defaulting to on for you) by simply clicking the 3D button at the bottom of the video. Either way, I recommend you not let it playback at 240 or whatever VGA-like resolution it wants to be for some reason. We didn’t buy a 1080-capable camera to have you watch it in Commadore-vision!

Incidentally, the camera sucks so bad at even the most basic blogging type camera uses that we’re getting rid of it. It’s already been replaced, in fact. Ironic that Sony made a camera called the Bloggie that only works in full daylight and focusing at things more than 5 feet away from it. I don’t know what videoblogs they’ve been smoking, but I guarantee you that most of them occur in a dark room somewhere with the camera being held inches from some dude’s face. In this video, that dude’s face is Jon’s and, if you so desire, it is in 3D.

At any rate, it’s always been our goal to open as many different types of boxes on camera. We should count them up and have a contest when we open our 100th different product on video. Stay tuned and the contents of a 1989 Donruss box may be yours to win! Oh here I go again selling our blog short. Back to the hard sell.

1988 SPORTFLICS 3D BOX BREAK… IT’S LENTACULAR!

* May not be the first, but a cursory glance at YouTube says it probably is. Who cares.
** “3D” is a bit of a stretch. The camera has 2 lenses but the sensors are so small that everything more than 5 feet away is always in focus. Anyone who knows anything about stereoscopy (and, believe it or not, Jon and I are two of those people since we have film degrees) knows that focus is the most obvious depth cue. But it really is worth a watch- sometimes the effect is surprisingly effective!